Wednesday, January 21, 2009

A Modest Proposal

It occurred to me watching all the inauguration coverage that it would be cool if they replaced Lincoln's eyes in the Lincoln Memorial with scary red lights. And maybe put a button at the base, so that when you pushed it, his eyes would light up.

Actually, what would be really cool is if his eyes would shoot out laser beams, and sort of randomly incinerate people as they walked by.

But I realize that might pose a safety hazard.


Mutha said...

Not to mention a public relations nightmare.

meno said...

The problem is the randomness of the people. I volunteer to pick the people who are to be lasered, you just get them to the Memorial.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Jeff. This totally made my day.

Gordo said...

There simply isn't enough fear of public monuments, these days. Kids climb all over statues, some twit was caught taking a leak on the war memorial in Ottawa a couple of years ago, too. Killer lasers in the eyes would bring back some healthy fear. I'm all for that.

Irrelephant said...

You know, don't you, that Lincoln's head is full of golden treasure, right?

Victoria Gothic said...

That's great. So, Irrelephant, would you care to join me in a mission to collect the gold from Lincolns head?

Eric Shonkwiler said...

I swear this is in a cartoon. Dexter's Laboratory, I think.

Irrelephant said...

Victoria, I'm all in! Just need to find my marble saw, several hundred feet of rope, a block and tackle, two Sumatran exotic dancers and a station wagon to haul the goodies away and we're in business!

Eric, it was Ren and Stimpy==you're not losing your mind. *lol* Tho I do miss Dexter something fierce.

Clowncar said...

Mutha, it would be worth all the lawsuits.

Agreed, Meno. I'll have my people call your people.

Glad to hear it, BI. How's the play going?

Gordo, I fear it would turn into a game. All those kids who used to ride skateboards on stars will now ge dodging lasers at teh Lincoln Memorial.

Irr, didn't understand the reference til I googled Ren and Stimpy. Don't you have betterthings to do than watch cartoons?

Vic, Irr, don the clownsuits. We're off to mine Lincloln's head.

Eric, you're right - see Irr's comment below (and my current post).

Ir, it was inadvertent. Great minds, same direction, yada yada.

Clowncar said...

Gordo. That's skateboards on stairs.

Though skateboards on stars would be cool to.